When we go out to a restaurant, there is a huge menu we choose from. These are items we love and want to indulge in . But they are not necessarily good for our health. We still bypass that thought and make the choice. We tell ourselves, it is only for that meal. So, we end up eating that food and develop indigestion or food poisoning.
Now, similarly , when damaging feelings enter us, we again must choose either to let them in and adopt them as ours or let them go immediately as being wrong for us. Knowing that this may start a pattern, we still accept these feelings because we want to retaliate.
The main cause is that we have not been able to separate ourselves from our egos. So, who gets hurt ? Who wants to retaliate ? It is the ego. If we learn to make a choice against the ego and in favor of ourselves, we can avert any illness of the mind.
If you want freedom from the ego, the most effective way is to simply acknowledge the undesirable thoughts and emotions that came in and the actions they set off. To say, “I was wrong” is really liberating. To say, “I am sorry” and MEAN it is even more liberating. It just clears the air within us and between two people also. Not that you mean to, but this rattles the opposite person and generally forces him or her to introspect.
Ultimately, our purpose is to work with love, not anger , resentment, fear or hatred, isn’t it ?Â
Surekha Kothari
surekhakothari.wordpress.com
Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari
Surekha Kothari 