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Archive for the ‘Mind’ Category

Reliability


There cannot be a better character trait than standing by your family and friends. Sadly, people change relationships like they change their attire. Actually, if you can’t stand by others, the deep seated meaning of this is that somewhere, deep down, you haven’t been able to stand by yourself.

We live by the courage of our convictions, those who don’t keep changing their convictions. And each time that this happens, they look for a change of people around them. The unfortunate part is that when you don’t have a relationship with yourself, you tend to become rather like a rudderless ship. Like a ship passing in the night that never docks.

Life can’t be lived like this, can it? One has to have loyalties and the strength to be with people because you have given them love, even if they sometimes have feet of clay. Don’t we all? You don’t abandon each other for being human, as long as humaneness is retained.

Opportunism is a close trait where loyalties fail. Going the way the wind blows. Reliability on these people would be a grave mistake. You will never know where you stand with them. There is also loyalty among thieves as we know. I am not referring to such loyalty. I speak of the kind of loyalty where you are of support in good times and bad times based on good value systems, because you care. Nothing less…though, could be more.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Comparison


An excerpt from Kangana Ranaut’s interview : ” I think somewhere, women don’t have acceptance for themselves. Women don’t support women, and this matter should be brought to light ( through films). Though they share a bond, I still feel that we don’t support each other the way we should. Like, at the smallest of things, we see girls make fun of girls themselves, our nature and how we look at each other as the inferior sex. So, somewhere, this needs to be deactivated.”

I was mulling over this comment and finding some truth alright. Apart from this being a cut throat world, women have been losing out due to personality issues. Sure, there are many women’s organizations and travel groups but…..

They call it a man’s world because they unite for a cause and their solidarity does often overtake that of women. They also tend to move on faster than women without focusing too much on petty issues. Traditionally, women were not insecure. In the Vedic age, women were strong and wise and lived shoulder to shoulder with the men. But later in history, they came to be called a weaker lot, dependent on the male. More so, after the moghul invasion. And today, when women are coming out of their shell, they will probably have to go through a period of transition till they start supporting each other for a greater cause of connectivity and look for a connection in each other rather than comparison.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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When there is drought, even a few drops of rain have the power to cause excitement. The kindness of people is similar. Every little sincere act inspires gratitude. The absence of genuine kindness is like a drought. So, suddenly, when you come across people who you haven’t had a close connection with but who spontaneously offer help, it makes you can feel those raindrops fall on your heart.

Life has become very clinical, mechanical ….like dance without expression, like music discordant, like a house which is not a home….I guess, I find the soul missing in many around me. And I often feel that souls on the earth must be experiencing much loneliness. Imagine being connected and not realizing it! Being lonely when there really is no need to be so. Deliberately hurting someone , not knowing that it is definitely coming back to you…or often knowing it but still doing it…succors for inviting grief.

Oh! Humans! Get a life!

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Constant habit


When we are depressed and angry with the world, we tend to go from bad to worse in our mental condition. Anger only dissipates your energy up to a level where you lose your ability to think straight, let alone heal yourself. And in this mode, you tend to become your own worst enemy.

This situation requires the ability to analyze the core issue of the anger because, as I have experienced it, anger is always self directed…for what could have happened but didn’t, for the wrong choices made, for lost opportunities, for a lack of love, for loneliness, for feeling rejection, depression…and more.

It is not easy to turn inwards. The mind only wants to blame and blame everyone and everything but the self.

And then, we seek recourse to prayer. Even after, we often wait for a change to HAPPEN rather than MAKE it happen. We need help.

A wonderful way to overcome this mode : just ask yourself..

Why am I angry?

Who am I angry with?

Why am I angry with that person or situation?

Did I contribute to it in any way?

Answer all these questions truthfully to yourself and you will find that most of the time, you failed to look within to find the actual issue. That you had the power to understand and let go but you held on.

Making a constant habit of this kind of clinical analysis can help you in cultivating a calm persona.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Life Journey


Whenever we judge people, we are indirectly telling ourselves that we are better than them. The truth is, if your mind is open and your intention is learning and growing, evolving to higher levels, you will find you can learn something from everyone.

But when the mind is not clear, we choose that we won’t mind learning from someone we like but not from someone we dislike. We grudge the latter their wisdom, their maturity. Very childish on our part. Because ultimately, WE lose out, not them. Like cutting our nose to spite our face kind of situation.

The problems in the world today arise somewhat from such polluted attitudes. We forget that we are travelling in a moving train where we will have to get off one day. We forget that the actual day of judgment is not when our ego judges someone but when WE are judged after our life.

I am amazed at what I see each day. You start with a shock, and then shock after shock at the way humans behave with each other and often due to small or not so small misunderstandings. Sometimes, rigidities. Often due to insecurities. Or, sometimes, it is just a huge ego and so on, until one day, it results in shock no more.

THAT is the day when your journey of detachment begins. The sooner, the better because attachment can make you so vulnerable that it has the power to kill, at least to make you physically very ill.

 Dying of heartbreak and hurt is not something you want to do. So, let every experience make you mentally and spiritually stronger every day. As they say, you can either swim or sink.

This is for all those people who love too much and unconditionally. If you do, do it as an act of God. And practice this: “Forgive them, Lord, for they know not what they do”, cleanse your mind and move on. No one is going to be with you all the time. A gentle reminder! Your journey is alone, my friends.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Traumas


“To hell and back” is common terminology when we go through an intensely bad experience and are trying to recover. None of us can actually live in anyone’s shoes to feel that intensity. Though we can try.

To feel someone’s pain, agony is an evidence of very deep soul connections. We don’t feel so for everyone and there is so much misery in this world.

The intense and searing pain that tears us apart at the suffering or death of a special person can create a hell around us on a daily basis. This is what depressions are all about. You get up in the mornings and the first thought is about these souls, that is, if you slept through the night before. This is true of all traumas that we go through in our lives at various ages, from rape to betrayals to abject misery and disenchantment.

The biggest service we can provide is to try and mitigate at least a percentage of that feeling of “hell” where they live. Even if we can touch one life in this manner.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Common sense says one must do what is progressive. What hinders progress is obviously our inability to THINK progressive. India being such an ancient country, it is steeped in various traditions. Each state has its own culture and traditions, almost as if it were a different country.

As a nation, we evolved. We tried to learn from other countries as did others from us. But somewhere, we started thinking that the definition of progress is more money, more power. The race is to become a power center. In every field.

This power center is like the honey that bees get attracted to and swarm around. And then, we develop a mob mentality ruled by these power centers. Basically, a mob mentality is mindless and can often become a dangerous trend.

Any belief that begins to border on fanaticism loses its core of origin. Every belief starts with an experience and gets strengthened as a stereotype which is then very hard to let go or change.

We must remember that stereotypes are valid for a period of time. And there valid reasons for their development and existence, too. But they are not all timeless.

We have heard ad nauseum that change is a constant. So, some truths also change with time. To move on and adapt ourselves would certainly be progress if the consequences all around would be win all around.

But if we try and hang onto some stereotypes which lost their value in an evolving world or within a changing context, we could end up in a regressive situation instead of a progressive one. And every phase is chronicled in history as the wisdom or the madness of men. We look back in judgment but what we need is to be vigilant and aware in every phase so that wisdom prevails and we need not look back with regret, small or big.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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