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Archive for January, 2020

Human emotions


The first casualty in the onslaught of the virtual world is human emotions. You can see it happening everywhere around you. And if you happen to be in the realm of the 60s and 70s, then the transition may be very apparent and not very palatable to many too bad if you feel that way. Also, ultimately, it doesn’t matter because the seniors are now guests of this world for a limited number of years.

The second casualty is time too much preoccupation with the laptops, iPads, cell phones and the like. If you whattsapp a family member, you might get a quicker reply than if you were to make a phone call. Also, please remember! No more sentiments like,” I called because I simply wanted to hear your voice”. You wouldn’t want to waste anyone’s precious time by calling now, would you?

And you can imagine what the third casualty would be? Yes, the depth of relationships. I think the word “casualty” must have been coined from “casual”, as in, a casual approach to everyone and everything.

Be like a computer. No emotions required. The computer doesn’t understand them. An Alexa or Siri can answer any question in the world but you can’t find a shoulder on it to rest your head and cry. Tears and fears may not be found in a virtual world and would show you “no result” in a couple of years.

Research says human beings will soon live for 150 and more years very soon. Virtually impossible in our book but getting there, we are told.

Virtually no one I know would agree to extend living so long. Not if all we have are robots to communicate with. There might not be any “real” people left by then. What a thought!

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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The fragility of life eludes many. Every night, we go to sleep, we don’t really know whether we are going to get up, get up healthy or with an ailment. Every day, we are so preoccupied with ourselves that we don’t focus on the fact that there is a larger machinery at work and we are merely small cogs in the wheel of life.

A dot on a large canvas is just that: a dot. Not the canvas. And we need to remember that each minute that the dot can be erased any time.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Each day, we experience our brand of reality. Things happen. Episodes have reactions and become memories we either cherish or battle with, to no positive end. Life becomes a problem only when you don’t accept what is going on.

Human minds can be much distorted, in that they value what needs to be discarded and discard what is of true value. And this is why life revolves around problems. WE are the problem, not life. We live within the constricted walls of unrealistic belief systems and negative thinking patterns. Cloudy skies can never provide clear vision. So, if we are to live well, we need to think of how we can see and accept our reality without judging and blaming.

Each one of us has to take ownership of our reality instead of living in some Technicolor dream sequence … and then the film ends!

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Even if I say so myself, our generation was taught well and specially in terms of consideration for one to be aware of our space and act circumspectly and respect the space of others. We also knew things like, you queue up on the left and let people move forward from the right. We never had cell phones back then but we knew that we were supposed to give way to the elders.

Today, just forget all this. Even airports and stations have become like parks. Not to mention malls huge crowds, some loitering while talking merrily on cell phones, oblivious of the fact that they are blocking people behind them. Escalators have become a plaything, to run up and down like kids, never mind who you can knock down in the bargain.

Of course, there IS nothing like queues for some. Cutting through J walkers has become the single most frustrating exercise in malls, stations and sometimes, at airports too.

There is NO consideration in people for anyone other than themselves. Naturally, there is a resulting chaos, conflict and much anger everywhere. Minds are frayed not only at the edges but from all sides.

Quantity over quality is an accepted situation. If you haven’t accepted this yet, you are in for depression and high blood pressure.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Environment


Every generation is a product of its environment. To compare what we had and we could not give the next generation is odious. Because life had changed so drastically by then that we could not have given that upbringing even if we wanted to. The wise and discerning parents of those times got their children married into similar families for smooth transition of their children. But those who didn’t were inadvertently responsible for many unhappy marriages due to a sea of differences in upbringing and value systems or a lack of similar ones. It became a chalk and cheese situation.

The children of such mismatches often contributed further to a functionality in these families resulting in distances.

Ultimately, it is “c’est la vie”. You accept and adjust and move on. Pining for what was or what could have been is like trying to hold sand in your fists. It will slip away before you know it.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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I have seen that many people push away good and caring relationships by taking them for granted or not understanding their brand of caring. Sometimes, there also seeps into a long term friendship a kind of envy which leads to two people growing apart.

When you have known someone a long time, and life takes you into different modes, you tend to look at that friend with a certain comparison. And if, at that time, you are an unhappy human being, you tend to forget the close bonds you shared and begin to gradually tear apart the relationship. And once you reach a point of no return, you have burnt your bridges until you realize what you lost. By then, it is too late.

Better to make a point in your book never to reach a point of no return. Life is not about “you”. It works only if it is about “us”, that “us” could be two people or more.

Besides, those who have experienced the bonds of love will tell you there is no feeling better, no joy greater than a no holds barred friendship and closeness. It could be between any two people. If the base is compassion on both sides, the rest follows.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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There will always be this issue of acceptance from and by people. We must necessarily be controlled and circumspect, though we might be pining to be free like a bird and do exactly as we please.

The need of being accepted stems from the human angle only, because of dependency on each other, as the famous saying goes: no man is an island. So, we follow rules. Allow our hearts to sing but keep a befitting exterior. Allow our anger to kill someone in our thoughts but smile and shake hands. Have several issues within but on being asked if we are okay, pat comes the reply,” no problem”.

In a way, we are all split personalities, always living more than one role, within and without. And even those change into multiple roles depending on situations.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Your “swadharma”, your inner calling! One of the major preoccupations that can elude you for a long time, it is what comes to you naturally. Something you gave an aptitude for, something that gives you happiness. And you enjoy it.

But how do you know what is your calling in life? Especially today, when there are opportunities galore, unlike earlier when there were very few lines one could take. There is every chance of confusion or of making a wrong choice.

All achievers have had one thing in common, that they have enjoyed every minute and been passionate about what they did.

However, it can be a challenge for multi talented people. They may be good at academics, arts, culture and much more. People have been known to change their paths when they discover their true inner calling.

The best way is to observe what feelings your activities / your career path are generating. Be aware, discuss with your teachers and friends, if and when required, and go with your happiness quotient.

I have seen that those who do not have a calling don’t end up developing their personalities or confidence levels and become complex and with complexes also.

Let it suffice for me to know that I have my own calling like everyone else does and I need to find it. Have faith that it is there and try to

Find it, even with help and advice from others if you are confused. Once you find it and work on it, you will find yourself appreciating others instead of falling short in your eyes.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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