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Archive for July, 2018


Kindness is not an oft seen virtue, especially among equals. Doling out charity is not necessarily seen as kindness. There could be other motives. There is real merit in reaching a stage where kindness can be meted out because it becomes your intrinsic nature. When you can actually look at people and not worry about whom they are because you have understood who YOU are. Reach that state and very little matters.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Wearing your attitude is an old saying. Actually, the difference is in its quality. An attitude is or should be an expression of who we are. Cultivated attitudes for presentation to the world are suspect, because that’s not who we are.

At the end of the day, we have to live with ourselves. So, if somewhere within us, we feel the need to enact an attitude superficially, we may not be confident that we will be liked for ourselves. Which means, deep down, that we don’t like ourselves too much?

The one we need to impress is ourselves, not others. As they say, we always talk about loving this one and that one, but how about loving ourselves so that our attitude may have genuineness to it?

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Every academic institution today boasts of in-house counselors for their students. This was not prevalent when we were studying. If I might make a somewhat general statement, the issues were of less severity and the one factor I remember is the respect we had for teachers and parents. Education was considered a noble vocation and the quality of teaching high.

That is not to say education is poor today, on the contrary. There is so much more available and all of it more within reaches than we had. But this is not always commensurate with our mental levels as well as maturity levels. There is definitely more conflict of choices and less focus on patience and depth of learning as in giving learning and the practice of it enough time.

The inevitably resulting emotional and mental agonizing would most definitely include disorders of the mind, feelings like depression, anger and frustration, hopelessness etc. We don’t know how far back these had come to stay within us. Starting with traumas related to birth itself.

So, within the last few years of my experience with counseling, I have really understood how deeply you need to understand a person before you can counsel them. How much of their energy you have to feel closely as if putting yourself in their shoes. It cannot be a superficial job if results are to be seen. And it is serious business because you are dealing with the psyche of people. The ideal result is calming and not aggravating the mind.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Option in life


We have so many postulates and generalities we speak out mechanically. “Good from far but far from good”. Really! I want to ask, are you talking about yourself? After all, everything in this world has a mirror effect.

If you look deep within each individual, there is something nice and good in everyone. So, when we believe the above saying about someone, we are just resonating and trying to cope with this feeling within ourselves. And if we ARE doing that, then we don’t know how to touch the positive core in another. Again, this means that we are unable to touch our own positive core because negative memories have taken over.

I keep thinking that in order to keep our health, we need to clean our homes, both inner and outer. Trying to clean someone else’s backyard will not clean up yours.

Frivolity and skimming the surface of life is an option. But for those looking for pearls, deep sea diving is the only answer.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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There are so many built in systems within us which, when we discover, we also marvel at. Putting them into words is difficult. Like the inner voice which tells you what to do if it is loud and clear. Of course, if we have muffled it along the way, it is a different story altogether.

Then the choices of feeling, should I mind this? Or should I feel bad? Should I feel happy or sad? Shall I give in or resist eating heavy calorie foods?

Then, there is the system of the body relating the story of the mind. All the psychosomatic problems that manifest in the body, telling us all is not well.

And if you know how to read the systems, you could nip any arising issues in the bud. There aren’t any external systems that can be originators of issues. Look within. All the treasure and all the “poison” is all there.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Getting into someone’s emotional shoes is very difficult. Sometimes, people are not even aware of what others go through. I mean the “near and dear” ones. A lack of compassion!  

Probably I can’t but be cynical when everyone makes the “right” moves and overtures because it is festival time and about the rest of the year, the less said the better.

Socializing, partying, endorsing “friendships” by being with friends and spending time with them has become more gratifying than spending time with family.

There should be less hypocrisy and more honesty because the world has changed and those who crave for family relationships must become wiser , less expecting and read the writing on the walls which are loud and clear.

I see so much isolation in the hearts of those who grapple to give a genuine smile to the world. It seldom reaches the eyes. Amidst the loud noise of the crackers, hearts are teary and heavy.

I am not morose, just saying it as I see it. And my heart goes out to those who have no joy in their hearts, whether Holi or Divali because they don’t want to go through the rights motions just for a day anymore.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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Life is fragile. Humans plod along merrily, not realizing this. As is said, when we make long term plans, God has the last laugh. Hasn’t it happened to us all that we are happy, even partying and merrymaking and wham! Comes news that a near and dear one is critically ill or has passed on without any known ailment.

And we stand still in shock for a while. Then life moves ahead. But we still don’t know how many breaths we have left or how many days to live. When King Parikshit was told he had only seven days to live, he thought only of turning towards God to understand the purpose of life and heard the entire “Bhagwat” in a week.

But despite many stories and symbolic meanings to these stories, we still plod along with a lack of awareness. Yesterday, one of my friends told me she is working towards changing things around for the better from within. Fantastic! And it is not easy because you have to watch every little thought, reaction and emotion that crosses your mind.

You have to sincerely forgive and be forgiven. You have to cleanse all past memories of the smallest negativity which can mirror others.

And all this before life runs out and you don’t know how much time has been given to you. So, expanding our consciousness each second should be our first priority. Looking to and lighting up our own path is crucial, as compared to being bothered about another person’s journey.

Ultimately, we have to rise and rise further. As we go higher, our choices reduce and it is a straight but painful and hopefully, steady climb to divinity.

Surekha Kothari

www.BodyMindSoulCentre.com

surekhakothari.wordpress.com

Speakingtree Blog: www.speakingtree.in/public/surekhakothari

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