Posts Tagged ‘dharma’

To accept another’s opinion of us is so difficult, isn’t it ? We are so worried about what that person will think of us if we accept a negative trait within us.

So, now the done thing is to keep up with a carefully cultivated image. The art of mastering the perfectly acceptable look, the perfectly crafted smile, sometimes with an equally perfect twinkle in the eye… and you can have many followers! The moot point is not to get ego stricken with the following but to face the humongous task of having to peel off that many layers more. I remember someone joking that the layers of make up that artists have to remove starts with the false eyelashes. This was perhaps indicative of the level of artifice that was reached.

Ofcourse, one cannot determine the components of happiness and “feeling good” about anyone. But I am sure of one thing, and that is the utter exhaustion that can happen with trying to superimpose the artificial over the natural.

Surekha Kothari


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“Karma” is known to all and understood by some. Over the years, the connotation of the word has acquired a negative connotation which is not how it should be understood.

If “Karma” is translated into its literal meaning , it means “action”. Many people are heard saying , “I didn’t act”. But to do nothing is also an action. The truth is , as long as we are on this earth, we MUST act. And those who say they didn’t act actually made a choice NOT to act. Our owning up that we do have a free will increases the ownership of our actions . If we start taking charge of  and the responsibility of our actions, then we automatically start gour lives with more s.

Often unknowingly, we attribute our actions to be a  response to others. However much we blame others for our ations, we will be fooling ourselves, because, as I said averred, we CHOSE to act that way.

Adler said, “Not what we have got, is important , but what we do with it. “ Each one of us has been dealt a pack of cards in life. But whether to play or not to play the hand is our choice.  More important is HOW to play that hand. The  “karma” cycle, therefore, is inevitable.

So, how does “karma” of one person differ from another ? It is the QUALITY of the karma that makes all the difference.  Is it  the INTENTION , the MOTIVE , the EMOTION attached to the action that is important ?

The reason why “karma” seems negative is because we are actually referring to actions that leave a residue of negativity after them. They are issues which are “unresolved” and have remained unresolved. Therefore, at some time or another, they present themselves before us to be neutralized and healed.

So, for example, if we  have a bad relationship , it will continue to be in our face again and again until we resolve it, either through dialogue which brings about a mutual understanding or forgiveness  or actions such as these. If this does not happen in this life, it is sure to surface in another lifetime.We have heard of “karmic” relationships, and indeed, they ARE.

  Many do not believe what I have just said. But the fact is , our mind and soul travel together and therefore, memory is as eternal as the soul. There is no getting away from the negative files that we pile up in our memory. They are an integral part of us and so, must be neutralized by us as well.

” Dharma” denotes our individual deeds and personal interactions. It encompasses our ability for good judgement and clarity and objectivity of vision.  In Hindu philosophy, “dharma” refers to our duty consciousness  or the “right” consciousness while performing our “karma”. As my guru, Hans Tendam has said in his book “Deep Healing”, “Good judgement is the result of experience. Experience is the result of bad judgement” .  The experiences we have as a result of bad judgement are the ones that create “unresolved” issues.

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